House of Roxy, Putney

Hauling my carcass halfway down the District Line to its official press launch, I'm intrigued by this new bar's handle: House of Roxy. I envisage rubbing shoulders with 1970s lounge lizard Bryan Ferry - all trademark brilliantined black quiff, white tux and winklepickers - and drawling doll Jerry Hall slithering around in a gold Antony Price gown creating, what stylistas refer to as, 'a fashion moment' (relive it here http://tinyurl.com/6zeo7x3 ). Not quite! This wee DJ dive bar looks like the sort of place developers might incorporate into an edge-of-town neo-Georgian 'lifestyle village' - alongside Zizzi, Costa Coffee and Karen Millen - hoping to persuade Brian and Geri, priced out of London, to relocate to Harlow or some other Home Counties heaven-on-earth. Don't get me wrong, boxy Roxy is perfectly pleasant; its £8(ish) cocktails - French Martini, Grasshopper and Screaming Orgasm (how very Harlow New Town!) - competently executed. It's just that I'm out of my comfort zone. I like to think I'm not IKEA man, preferring my martinis served with a twist of louche; hence, the reason why Kinleigh Folkard and Hayward have yet to show me around any des res pads in suburban SW15. If, however, you live near this green and genteel place, House of R is deffo worth a punt. Fire in and share a frozen bottle of Xero vodka (£35) and a couple of Jammy Doughnuts (Chambord and Baileys; who knew?) with the Putney 'In' Crowd. 'In' Crowd? Bryan Ferry? 1974 Dobie Gray cover? Keep up at the back! 
141 Upper Richmond Road SW15 8785 9203 www.houseofroxy.com