In a sleek lobby, next to an extraordinary sculpture, a vast cluster of glitterballs I dub ‘disco haemmorrhoids’, I’m greeted by a gym-buffed faun in fawn. The boy with the come-slither-stare's too-tight waistcoat and bum-accentuating strides are less Tom Ford more Tom of Finland (whadya mean, is there a difference?) He escorts me along crepuscular jet marbled halls to my semi-clandestine destination. As the door whore/quality controller at her Anne Robinson-esque lectern rates me not the weakest link, I’m shown into Wyld. One of two bars at the bling-tastic new W hotel, it’s touted as London’s next late-late lair for urban foxes such as Kate Moss who partied here with Primal Scream, Jade Jagger and Liam Gallagher ahead of its official launch. You’ll get the general vibe from its American owners’ promo movie (http://tinyurl.com/2aztx4e ) Entitled Away We Stay, it's an homage to Antonioni’s Blow-Up. Razzie-worthy performances from high cheek-boned high-roller target W guests, David Gandy and Helena Christensen, demonstrate why models should stick to just looking pretty. The mother of all glitterballs spins in what feels like the VIP room at a Miami nightclub circa Crockett & Tubbs. I sink serviceable cocktails: El Chapo, no cheapo at £12.65 (inc service). Wyld, you see, ‘pays tribute to the liquid soul of Mexico, Tequila.’ The lounge’s dominant red tone, however, pays tribute to The Aberdeen Angus Steak House’s illuminated sign on Leicester Square below. Post-modern irony? Coincidence? It only opened on Monday but, already, I can feel myself growing curiously wild about Wyld.
10 Wardour St. W1D 6QF 7758 1000 http://www.wlondon.co.uk/
