The Sun Tavern, Bethnal Green

I rather like the cut of the Discount Suit Co geezers' cloth -  http://tinyurl.com/l6dj4fc. So, I'm in like Flynn to try on their new outfit for size. That'll be an old cloth cap Bethnal Green boozer re-tailored to suit that faubourg's inky, beardy, Brylcreem-y boys - indistinguishable from the original Sun's patrons, back in the day when local songbird, Marie Lloyd (pictured), was wowing them in the cheap seats at nearby Sebright Music Hall with a rousing chorus of Roll Out The Barrel. The barrels rolled out here are local-ish...and deeply drinkable. Crate. Partizan. Pressure Drop. Beavertown. Talking of Beavertown, the bar's Peaky Blinder interior - dark, deconstructed, dissolute - recalls the sort of louche East End taproom where muffs and molly boys for hire would give it up for a port and lemon and a shilling, "kind sir", up the back alleyway...so to speak. Port (white) and lemon appear here in shippers pie plant (along with gin, pink grapefruit and rhubarb cordial), one of various fixes, fine at £7.50. Served in pewter tankards, ideas such as apricot brandy grog, the bogcutter, contain Paddy moonshine; the bar being big on poitin. (Question for the PC police? Can I still say "Paddy"? As I'm 100% Jock, I'll risk it). Adroitly dispatched off-menu requests - negroni/ old fashioned - confirm the boys behind the bar aren't merely decorative. "Check out the talent!" beams a blonde bird waiting for Jacques de Sores to appear (rums from Cuba and Martinique, Velvet Falernum, lime, honey water and Angostura charged with prosecco, £8). Welcome to The Sun, a Page 3 stunner! 
441 Bethnal Green Road E2 0AN www.thesuntavern.co.uk

Discount Suit Company, Whitechapel

(how to look like Dermot O'Leary, on the cheap?)

                                               

Fancy somewhere new to wet your whistle? Try this dishy wee dive bar located in the former stock room at Discount Suit Company (It does what it says). As suits go, this is more flea market find than The Kooples, the French chain that's suddenly all over our high streets like a bad rash? Who shops there? Stylists for bad boy bands? The chain's up-its-own-cul (that's "arse" in Parisian prick speak) 'we're-so-kool' kooply advertising campaign gives me 'the dry boak' - as a Sauchiehall Street tailor would put it (supposing that once great Glasgow shopping strasse still housed such chaps; bursting at the seams as it now is with similarly nantoise schmutter merchants.) What? Oh yes, I digress. Rant over. I'm back in the bar. To classic Wigan Casino sounds, hang out with cute Cockney sparras and buff boys that work Petticoat Lane's barras (you wish!). Knock yourself out on bargain-ish booze (or the cellar's low-slung beams - fatal for anyone who shops for suits at High and Mighty)  Try on the ‘tails for size. I like the look of the sours or sloe gin and apricot fix, Charlie Chaplin. Mezcal, velvet falernum, pineapple and lemon number Pina Fumada? ”Oooh, suits you sir!”

29 Wentworth Street E1 7TB 07887 560 421 http://www.discountsuitcompany.co.uk